Rindercella the Pryslexic Dincess

Rindercella and her sugly isters lived in a marge lansion. Rindercella
worked very hard - frubbing scloors, emptying poss pits and shivelling
shot. At the end of the day she was nucking fackered.

The sugly isters were right bugly astards. One was called Mary Hinge and
the other was called Betty Swollocks. They were really forrible uckers and
had fetty sweet and fetty swannies.

The sugly isters had tickets to go to the ball but the cotton runts
wouldn't let Rindercella go. Suddenly there was a bucking fang and her
gairy fodmother appeared. Her name was Shairy Hithole and she was a light
rucking fesbian.

She turned a pumpkin and six mite whice into a hucking cuge farriage with
six dandy ronkeys who had buge hollocks and dig bicks. The gairy fodmother
told Rindercella to be back by dimnight otherwise there would be a cucking
falamity.

At the ball Rindercella was dancing with the prandsome hince when suddenly
the clock struck twelve."For suck's fake!" yelled Rindercella as she ran
out, tripping barse over ollocks and dropping her slass glipper.

Next day the prandsome hince knocked on Rindercella's door and the sugly
ister let him in. Suddenly Betty Swollocks lifted her leg and let off a fig
bart.

"Who's fust jarted?" asked the prandsome hince. "Blame that fugly ucker
over there," said Mary Hinge. When the brinking stown cloud had lifted the
prandsome hince tried the slass glipper on both the sugly isters without
success. Their feet stucking fank. Betty Swollocks was ducking fisgusted
and gave the prandsome hince a nack in the kickers.

This was not difficult has he had bucking fuge halls and a hig bard-on. He
tried the slass glipper on Rindercella and it fitted pucking ferfectly.
They were married. The hince lived his life in lucking fuxury and
Rindercella lived hers with a follen swanny.

And they hived lappily ever after...

On a mission from God

From the Australian Financial Review
http://afr.com/articles/2005/10/07/1128562968352.html

'God told me to invade Iraq'
Oct 07 08:39
PA

US President George Bush has said that he was instructed by God to invade Iraq and Afghanistan, according to a new BBC series.

The claim comes from the first meeting between the US leader, the Palestinian Prime Minister Mahmoud Abbas (also known as Abu Mazen), and his then foreign minister in June 2003.

The ministers say that Bush also revealed to them that he had been told by God to create a Palestinian state.

Former Palestinian foreign minister Nabil Shaath, now the information minister, describes the meeting with the US leader, in the BBC2 program, Elusive Peace: Israel and the Arabs.

He says: "President Bush said to all of us: 'I'm driven with a mission from God.
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'God would tell me, 'George, go and fight those terrorists in Afghanistan'.'

"And I did, and then God would tell me, 'George, go and end the tyranny in Iraq...' And I did.

"'And now, again, I feel God's words coming to me, 'Go get the Palestinians their state and get the Israelis their security, and get peace in the Middle East.' And by God I'm gonna do it."

Abbas, who was also at the meeting in the Egyptian resort of Sharm al-Sheikh, recounts how the President told him: "I have a moral and religious obligation.

"So I will get you a Palestinian state."

A BBC spokesman said the content of the program had been put to the White House but it had refused to comment on a private conversation.

The three-part series charts the attempts to bring peace to the Middle East, from Bill Clinton's peace talks in 1999/2000 to Israel's withdrawal from the Gaza strip.

The program speaks to presidents and prime ministers, their generals and ministers, about what happened behind closed doors as the peace talks failed and the intifada exploded.